I wrote this one today when I was having a very weird bad moment. I was letting my feelings and emotions control me again, as I often do. I was sitting in my bathroom on the toilet lid with my notebook, and it just came out. Really fast. It's sort of like a visual of Jesus if we could see Him, and what He would do. I like to imagine this is how He is when I'm upset. It's easier to feel comforted when I can imagine Him in a physical form, as a person holding me. It doesn't have a title really.
How many times have I sat
Here in your lap
Your arms wrapped around me
While I cry
tears soaking your shirt
I can feel your warm breath
On the top of my head
Your heart beating
In a rythm like a song
Singing to my soul
Letting me know that
As long as I need to sit
Here in your lap
You won't let me go
How many times have we had
This conversation
Where I tell you
How I feel used and hurt
Sad and useless
Like nothing
And you tell me I am everything
And Beautiful
That it doesn't matter
That they never loved me
Because you do
What more can I ask for?
And how many times
Have I looked to people to fulfill me
Make me whole
Fill this emptiness
Erase the loneliness
Until I have you and only you
I'll never find anyone
To complete this hole
Dissapointment and heart break
Break ups and abandonment
I feel as if this is all I have to look forward to
If I persuse relationships with them
So I won't
My focus on One thing
Not in need of the rest
Wait it out
Until You bring me the best
